My Savannah

I think of the times that I wondered whether or not I would have children. Whether it was during the time of my life that I really didn't think about it, or the year after we decided to try getting pregnant, when I was very obviously NOT getting pregnant; and I remember saying that it would be okay, that I wouldn't know what I was missing if I didn't have a baby. I am so glad that God decided to bless me with my Savannah.

From the moment they held her up for me to see, I was unequivocably, irrevocably, in love with my child. The last four and a half years have quite literally been the fastest years of my life. Milestone upon milestone pile up upon each other. I have always said that my daughter never sleeps. From early on, she has woken up many times per night, much to my chagrin; but since her fourth birthday she suddenly has been sleeping through the night. Not like I have heard other parents to say their children do, but 9:30 p.m.-6:30 am is AWESOME for her. And you know what? The times that she came and woke me up in the middle of the night, at the time were frustrating, but I look back and think of how sweet those time actually were; with her sweet breath breathing into my neck as she told me that she loved me. I wouldn't have had her any other way.

My sweet girl is just as adventureous as I am. When we go out, we go here, there and all around, and she doesn't want to go home. She always wants to go somewhere else. She loves to go everywhere. And she has always traveled well. Which has been a great blessing, because so much of our family lives so far away. Some of my favorite times in life are when Savannah and I go on trips together, just the two of us. They are such special bonding times.

Every day I thank my heavenly father for the precious gift that he has given me. When she orders blue ice cream with brown sprinkles, rejoices in a bubblebath, and tells her daddy "I love you cowboy" to which he responds, "I love you too cowgirl", I can't help but smile and be thankful for this beautiful gift that we have been graced with. . . . .my beautiful Savannah. Everyday is a gift.

Scott's Trip

My dear husband is on a plane as we speak, flying to Indianapolis for the Brickyard 400. He is so excited! He won the trip through ABC Supply ( his employer). ABC is a sponser of the race and every year they draw thirty-five names of their employees and treat them to an amazing weekend for the race. They fly them up on Friday, put them up at the Hilton downtown and pay for everything!! He gets to tour the pits on Saturday and watch qualifying, and Sunday the race from the luxury box. All food, all drink included. Then he flies home on Monday. I hope that my honey has an AMAZING time!

And now, six months later. . .

It is July 21, 2010. I haven't blogged now in six months. Mainly because I forgot how to get into the sight. Yes, I know--incredibly stupid. But I have figured it out and as I have a few moments, thought that I would check in and let everyone know what is up.

First and foremost, I have not lost the weight that I intended to lose. I am very frustrated about this fact. My husband has done an amazing job however and is down eighty pounds! I am so proud of him. He is running and doing just great.

As to what is going on in my life, it is very full, but not full of the things that I love. It is filled with work, work, work. I am not a lazy person, but I am not happy being tied to a job that I feel drains the life out of me and leaves nothing else for anyone. Primarily my husband and child, whom I love so much.

For those of you out there that feel like praying for a girlfriend, I could use all that you can send my way!

Cheerio!

The Weigh We Were

For anyone who has ever struggled with their weight, this one is for you.

My husband and I made a commitment to ourselves and to each other that this is the year--nothing is to stand in our way--that we take back our lives and get healthy. I am really trying hard not to look at all the other times that I have made that commitment to myself. I know that this time will be different. I have a daughter who will be four on Tuesday and I really want to change my life before she realizes that I am fat!

I have said all along that I won't hold my child back because of my being overweight and so far that really hasn't been an issue. I have put on my plus size bathing suit and braved it on the beach and at the pool many times. I play on the playground with her. But, as she gets older, she wants to go to Dollywood and all these places that her friends are talking about and I realize, you know, my rear end will not fit into a tilt-a-whirl or a roller coaster. I know that she is still a tad too young for those things but there are rides that she can ride, and who is going to ride them with her? I will not hold my child back! This is a point of great emotion for me.

I have been overweight now for sixteen years. And this is the last year. This is my time. This is my husbands time. It is actually hard for me to imagine my life being different because it has been this way for so long. I want to feel better. I am tired of hurting. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am young at heart and I love to have fun, but inside I feel tired and old. This is the end. Or, the beginning.

It is January 28. I started counting Points on Weight Watchers on the January 1. I have lost 14 pounds. Not bad, not bad. My cousin is getting married at the end of April and my first goal is to have lost 50 pounds by then. I will be seeing a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long time and I just want to be well on my way. So, here is to me and April 24! Cheers!